A Fart of Negativism!!

TO all the bloggers and writers out there, this is my first note (Rather my first literary piece) ever. So if u'll find the content too shabby or inconsistent,  I apologize.

As I near my demise as a student, just ready to enter the corporate world, or so I think, there are so many questions arising in my mind as to what is my true purpose in life. Relax! I'm not introspecting on a spiritual level or something. My career still seems to be my biggest concern at the moment. I think, and I say this with much regret, I am too scared to face the world and accept challenges as they bombard my near future because of the fact that being a Mumbaikar, I may not have seen the hardships others normally face in life.

What do I DO? Where do I GO? These questions do not emphasize the 'What' and the 'Where', it's the 'doing' and 'going' which scares me. Amongst the ocean of expectations that we are constantly surrounded by 24x7, I feel that I'm incompetent to fulfil them. But then, this glimmer of hope shines at the distant horizon that soomeday, maybe, ill find my passion in life. Don't get me wrong. It's not that I don't have one. It's that I have one too many. Sometimes choices do fuck your case don't they!

On one hand, the huge media industry awaits with open arms to embrace me into its long working schedules, untimely eating habits, excessive intake of coffee and cigarettes while discussing utter crap about some brilliant shit created by some fag agency people don't know about, etc.(No wonder they pay a lot!) and on the other,there is, the currently out of money film industry, trying to lure me into the false glamour, indecent behaviour, frivolous parties and an overload on sex and drugs (I'm being too cocky for my own good!).

On one hand there is Photography, which I enjoy doing. But frankly, there are a thousand others, who can make a butt crack look beautiful, a talent I certainly don't possess. On the other hand there's the Creative ad industry which will throw me away like a condom which has not been shagged on ("Oh you know, you don't have the experience", they'll say).

I don't know whether these choices have spoilt me or I have just been pesimistic too soon. But I do know that someday, and sometime soon, I want to be working at a job I love doing even if it does not pay much. If I achieve this goal, I would be a very satisfied man at the end of the day.

P.S I tried to end it with a positive note. It's been a very long time since I've been so cynical. I still am an optimistist. This note is just like a fart of negativism to remove the pressure. Cheers n Kudos!! :)